You never quite get used to the smell

When the cat uses his tray, I pretend not to notice and wait for someone to say, “Gee, I better go change the litter box.” And I would then say, “Oh goodness! I didn’t notice! Are you sure? Okay then, thanks so much. I’ll be here just filing my nails.”

This is not how it generally occurs. Instead, it’s rather more like this:


Molly: Oh, God. My eyes are burning.

Husband (doubled over, heaving): It’s worse than the smell of your cooking!

Molly: Yeah, it’s worse than that chicken and broccoli dish.

Me: We don’t speak of that one, remember?

Husband: No, but you have to admit, it’s worse.

Me: Come on guys, it’s just a poop.

Molly: It’s not just a poop. It’s demonic sludge from the ninth realm of Hell.

Husband (clutching his heart): It’s almost like he hates us. Why doesn’t he just go outside? There’s a cat door right next to the litter box.

Me (stifling my gag reflex): I repeat. It’s just a poop.

Husband: No. It’s not.

Me: Well can’t someone else do it this time? Just once?

Molly: Do what? Call the exterminators?

Husband (after a sigh): Okay then. I’ll do it.

Me: Aw, thanks honey.

Darryl: No, I meant that I’ll call the exterminators.

Me: Fine. I’ll go clean up the toxic sludge then.

Husband: Goodbye, my love.

I don the Breathing Apparatus and HAZMAT tool (aka handkerchief and poop scoop) and get to work.

And I resolutely ignore the giggles coming from the other end of the house.




28 thoughts on “You never quite get used to the smell

  1. I have never had an indoor cat but I used to work with a client that had two and I had to change the litter box…I would try to hold my breath for as long as I could as I scoop it up. But as the life long owner of multiply dogs I can unequivocally tell you that dog diarrhea at 3am in the morning that runs down your unlevel kitchen floor and goes under and behind the stove and fridge is way worse than any cat poop in the littler box story! Oh the gross dog stories I could tell…..

    Liked by 1 person

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