Cake

“It must be time for cake,” I said. “We’ve been working for a whole hour.” “But you just had cake.” “Yes, but I only had a small slice. And it’s sponge which means it’s mostly just air. Besides, it’ll go stale if we don’t eat it.” “Things don’t go stale in an hour.” “You don’t … More Cake

The Principal

The “see how she’s settling in” interview with my daughter’s principal was due. Wanting to make a good impression, I wore a dress – something I don’t do normally. I also added makeup and heels. The professional look, you know. “Please don’t, Mum. You know how you are in heels. And that makeup makes you look funny.” … More The Principal

Puzzle (not) fun

Jigsaw puzzles. The invention of demons from the ninth dimension of hell… After several hours staring at about 736 plain blue pieces and trying to connect them in some order, I decided it was time for the scissors. “Mum, you can’t do that.” “Why not?” “Because then the picture won’t fit together. And it’s cheating. … More Puzzle (not) fun

Trust issues

Trust is an interesting thing, isn’t it? I mean, we trust that the guy flipping our burger hasn’t had his finger up his nose moments before. We trust that the barista hasn’t spat in our coffee because she didn’t like the way we paid with ten-cent coins and pocket lint, promising to pay her the … More Trust issues

Kids are so…

Kids are great for your self-esteem. What Mum isn’t chuffed when their daughter tells them they look like a butterfly? “Aw, thanks honey,” said I, slightly blushing. “Yeah,” she said. “Your arms are all droopy – just like butterfly wings. Weeee! Flap, flap, flap!” I smiled tightly and patted her on the head. “Yes, Mummy is a … More Kids are so…

Counting chickens

  “Is it my fault the chickens ate my homework?” “It is when you smear it with honey and seed and leave it in the chicken coop.” “I had to. I hate algebra.” “You think the chickens don’t?” “I saw Bock-Bock scratching triangles in the dirt. I just put two and two together.” “Did you … More Counting chickens