The Principal

The “see how she’s settling in” interview with my daughter’s principal was due. Wanting to make a good impression, I wore a dress – something I don’t do normally. I also added makeup and heels. The professional look, you know. “Please don’t, Mum. You know how you are in heels. And that makeup makes you look funny.” … More The Principal

Puzzle (not) fun

Jigsaw puzzles. The invention of demons from the ninth dimension of hell… After several hours staring at about 736 plain blue pieces and trying to connect them in some order, I decided it was time for the scissors. “Mum, you can’t do that.” “Why not?” “Because then the picture won’t fit together. And it’s cheating. … More Puzzle (not) fun

Musical chairs

What sadist invented musical chairs? You prance around an ever-diminishing set of chairs in the hope no one accuses you of ‘crowding’, sees your dance moves, or pushes you headlong into another participant. And in the end, everyone resents the winner, and the players win a crappy plastic bracelet each. What kind of game is that? … More Musical chairs

Kids are so…

Kids are great for your self-esteem. What Mum isn’t chuffed when their daughter tells them they look like a butterfly? “Aw, thanks honey,” said I, slightly blushing. “Yeah,” she said. “Your arms are all droopy – just like butterfly wings. Weeee! Flap, flap, flap!” I smiled tightly and patted her on the head. “Yes, Mummy is a … More Kids are so…